BOOB Girl Bold

BOOB GIRL BOLD!

I watch The Walking Dead. I admit it.

I also watch American Idol. I admit that, too.

The Walking Dead is, of course, the story of a Zombie apocalypse, where a world- wide infection attacks almost everyone. The few still-humans, called “Alives” fight the Zombies and strangely enough, each other. This is the show that spawned Zombie Walks, costumes, movies and became an icon of American pop culture.

A lot of people are surprised I watch Walking Dead.

About an equal number are surprised I watch Idol.  Both are shows of:

·        Hope

·        Courage

·        Growth

·        Strength

·        Grief

·        And particularly with the Zombie problem, of how we change when confronted by severe crisis.

The Walking Dead is tremendously violent and gory. Those ugly Zombies don’t just lie down and die, they try to eat you. My friend Andy, a fellow Walking Dead enthusiast, has a tee shirt that says, “Zombies just love what’s inside of you.”

And it was receiving some tee shirts after Andy and I had done some talking about the show to the attendees of the International Conference on Death and Grief, that I had an idea.

I would do something bold. Something different. Something unexpected from an old lady, a BOOB Girl. I would be BOOB GIRL BOLD.

This next week, every day for one week, no matter what I am doing or where I am going, I will wear one of my Zombie shirts. One day I am teaching Sunday School – in a Zombie tee shirt. I have a breakfast date with a handsome gentlemen – I’ll be wearing a Zombie tee shirt. I have a wine and cheese party – in a Zombie shirt. I have a group happy hour. I’m the one in a Zombie tee shirt.

Here are what the shirts I have so far say:

1.     This is My Zombie Killing Shirt

2.     You are my friend, but if we are chased by Zombies, I am totally tripping you.

3.     Rule #1 Cardio (small runner with EKG grid behind him chased by Zombies)

4.     Zombie To-Do List

·        Moan loudly

·        Drag feet

·        Eat survivors

·        Infect population

·        Eat more survivors

·        Try not to die again

5.     Because Daryl Said So (Daryl is the red neck archer in the group)

6.     Michonne and The Boys (Michonne is the Samari Amazon who captured two Zombies and leads them around in chains. – It’s complicated.

7.     Zombie Burger (Zombie hand holding burger advertising Zombie Burger in Des Moines, Iowa. I like this one. It matches my new purple sandals.

And for a special occasion I have a Dracula shirt I can substitute.

Today Wigs, my nail tech of 25 years, polished my nails with a silver, sparkly polish called “Make Light of the Situation”. Perfect Zombie killing color.

What is important here is that we not be mistaken for  grandmothers sitting in our rockers on the front porch. We are the generation of women who built the front porch.

We are the women who do something daring, different , off the wall.

We are BOOB GIRL BOLD.

I challenge you all to think of something you can do that is totally different from what people expect of you and to do it for one week. This may be the week you put lavender tint on your hair, appear in a sexy pair of jeans, get arty fingernails.

Then report back.

Tell me what happened.

I’ll be taking notes on my week with the Zombies. I expect some funny expressions and experiences. So wish me well, and start thinking. I want you to be part of this. I want you to be notorious. It may be book worthy.

As my tee shirt says when I speak to groups:

Careful or you’ll end up in my novel.

Come Get A Hug

A lot of you have heard my BOOB Girl presentation at one time or another. I’d love to see you again, or see friends you have sent. Here is the August schedule.

Special Event: Saturday, August 1, Aurelia, Iowa, Public Library, 1pm

This is the home of that neat location in BOOB Girls VII: Ten Little Puritans, of Butch Sleezer’s Fertility Center. You don’t want to miss this if you’re within 100 miles of Aurelia.

Friday, August 7: Fundraiser for Creston, Iowa, public library. 4PM, tea at Adams Street Espresso. Tickets on sale at 641-782-2277/

Omaha Area:

Saturday, August 8: Council Bluffs Senior Center, 12:30PM, 714 S Main St, Council Bluffs, IA (712) 323-5995

Tuesday, August 11: Louisville NE Senior Center –12:30PM 423 Elm Street

402-234-2120

Friday, August 14: Family Services Senior Center, 1PM. 43^rd and Fort, Omaha

Wednesday, August 26 6:30 PM, Lakeside Village, 174^th Francis, Omaha

Haven’tordered BOOB Girls VII: Ten Little Puritans?

Send $15 to Joy Johnson, Box 4600, Omaha NE 68104, for a signed, inscribed copy with no shipping costs.

  

July Blog From Joy

July Blog from Joy and The BOOB Girls

Launch!:The launch party for BOOB Girls VII: Ten Little Puritans was a tremendous success with more than 100 people coming to our Centering Corporation office to laugh, listen to music and meet some of the characters from the book. Thank you!

Laugh!: The reviews of VII are all good. It’s a funny read and has some of the strangest, off-the-wall names of any of the series.

Listen!: Don’t tell anyone, but BOOB Girls VIII is in the works. While I spent a lot of time thinking about plots (how DOES Stephen King do it??) some of my readers asked about the girls’ background. Who are they? What were they growing up? So the next book’s working title is Learning to Love Willie and will tell the backstory and be a take-off on nursery rhymes.

In the meantime.

If you haven’t gotten Ten Little Puritans yet, here’s how:

Send a check to me, Joy Johnson, for $15

Box 4600, Omaha NE 68104

I’ll take care of the shipping and it will be inscribed and signed. 

Now take a quick peek at a snippet from VIII, which hopefully will be ready to launch around Valentine’s Day.

People often ask how much of the books are from my own experiences.

This one is. It really happened to me. 

Mary Rose, Marge and Hadley are worried because Robbie seems bored and lethargic. They secretly enroll her in an online senior dating site. This is one of her first dates.

Note: BSTHI stands for Big, Strong, Tall, Handsome, Intelligent.

From BOOB Girls VIII

“So?” Hadley asked. “How did it go? Tell all, girlfriend.”

Robbie tossed her purse into a corner and stepped out of her sandals. She plopped down on Hadley’s sofa and let out a long breath.

“Was he BSTHI, Robbie?” Mary Rose asked, her eyes getting wide and her grin getting bigger.

Robbie smiled, “Oh, he was BSTHI all right, Mary Rose. But in this case the ‘H’ had to stand for ‘Homely.’ He definitely wasn’t much to look at and I really believe old men are terrified of old women who have bright nails and are over five feet seven inches tall.” She shook her head. “Here’s how it went, girls.”

They leaned toward her. As Robbie began, Marge came in from the kitchen with four glasses of iced tea and passed them around. She settled onto the couch next to Robinson Leary. Robbie straightened up and shook her head.

“As Josh Billings said, ‘there is great power in words as long as you don’t hitch too many of them together.” Well, I have never been with a man who hitched more words and talked so much, without really saying anything. If being a good listener is a virtue, he won’t be crossing the pearly gates anytime soon. Like Twitter, St. Peter’s too busy these days for any more than one hundred forty characters. As soon as we shook hands he started in on his resume of suffering about how he climbed the ladder into becoming a Strategic Air Command officer. He went on and on and on and frankly I couldn’t care less.”

She sipped her tea and shook her head once again. She looked at her three friends who were listening intently. “After about ten minutes of non-stop suffering, he took a drink of his soda and I blurted out, ‘In my off-hours I’m an axe murderer.’”

Mary Rose gasped, Hadley blinked twice and Marge chuckled.

“It went right by him!” Robbie said, making a quick gesture past her head with her free hand. She looked as if she didn’t believe it herself. “I thought maybe he was hard of hearing, but he wasn’t. He just kept climbing that ladder through officer training, the fellow captain he hated and how they should have promoted him faster. Suffer, suffer, suffer. As my husband used to say, ‘Piss, Moan, Bitch.’ So when he took a breath, and believe me he needed one, I leaned toward him a little and said, ‘I know four ways to dispose of a dead body.’”

This time all four girls laughed. “That’s not what got his attention,” Robbie said, smiling and pulling her bare legs up under her, putting her arm on the back of the couch and looking at Mary Rose. “I used your line, Mary Rose. After another ten minutes of his talking and not looking at me, I said, ‘I watch The Walking Dead and I know how to kill a zombie.’

“He stopped short and stared at me. I am convinced there is a universal fear of a zombie takeover of the world and that they’ll capture the government and run it like some of the zombies we have now.”

All four girls were still grinning. Robbie went on. “He looked at me, finally for the first time, then he cocked his head and said, “You watch The Walking Dead?”

“Yep. And I know how to kill a zombie.”

“What is a lovely lady like you doing watching a show like that?”

“Learning to kill zombies?”

“And how does one do that?”

Robbie took a sip of her tea. “He had excellent grammar, like ‘how does one?’ So I said, ‘One needs a sword and a whole lot of kitchen utensils.’ Then he stood up, shook my hand, thanked me for coming and left.”

She looked at Hadley. “Is your computer on?”

Hadley nodded. Robbie got up from the couch. “Come with me ladies, I’m going to order a tee shirt. I saw it online. It’s black and says, This is My Zombie Killing Shirt.”

Mary Rose hurried after her. “I want one too, Robbie!”\

_________________________________________________________________

The best part of this blog? I told this story at the International Conference on Death and Grief at the University of Wisconsin, La Crosse. And people started sending me zombie shirts!!!! Ben from Centering helped me get a shirt from Zombie Burgers in Des Moines, Iowa. I now have 5 great shirts.

1.     Zombie hand holding a burger, from Zombie Burger.

2.     This is My Zombie Killing Shirt (ordered by me, online)

3.     Rule 1 – Cardio (runner chased by Zombies – gift)

4.     Zombie to do List (gift)

            Moan Loudly

            Drag Feet

            Eat Survivors

            Infect the Population

            Eat more survivors

            Try not to get killed again

5.     Birthday gift from VSBFF – Dracula: Man or Beast

She likes to be different.

OK girls. I need three more Zombie or Walking Dead shirts (size L)to have an “Old Lady Wearing Zombie Shirts Week. Feel free to send me the most tasteless ones you can find. Just zombie them off to the address above and I promise a photo will appear on the BOOB Girls Facebook page.

You will all agree with me, I know, that a lady has to update her wardrobe now and then to stay in style.

I love you all

Thank you for loving me and for loving The BOOB Girls.

 

 

 

 

A Quick Read from BOOB Girls VII

Gentle good spring, BOOB Girl buddies. Here is a snippet from BOOB Girls VII: Ten Little Puritans. It was fun to write and you should be getting an invitation to a fundraising book launch later this spring. The book launch is a delightful, laugh-filled party with live music, cheap champagne, popcorn with goldfish crackers and M&Ms and fun. But before that – here is this.

The girls have been called back to Salem’s Crossing by Scooter McKooter who needs help at her bed and breakfast. There is a huge Puritan Descendants Reunion in town and the girls, Scooter, Geoffrey and Ken David David are welcoming the first guests. This gives you a short look at the wonderful names appearing in this story, which is a take-off of Agatha Christie’s And Then There Were None. The guests are arriving:

Excerpt from the book: Just as the last old fashioned fountain pen was positioned beside the antique reproduction guest registers Scooter had ordered online, and just as Ken David took the last bite of the donut he had swiped from the Old Country Roses serving plate on one of the tables, the first car pulled up into the circle drive in front of the bed and breakfast. An attractive couple in their fifties got out, took an approving look at the mansion and began to walk up the path leading to the porch. All five women and Ken David took a deep breath. Geoffrey quietly took his own donut off the plate while his people were all looking outside.

“Hello and welcome,” Scooter said, opening the door for her first guests. 

Everyone smiled, nodded and Hadley and Marge both sat down at the tables, waiting to see which the couple would choose. The sound of a second car echoed in from the driveway. Guests were arriving.

“We’re the Simptums,” the lady said. She was dressed in an attractive jogging suit which subtly said she had money. Her husband was in jeans, sneakers and a crewneck shirt.

“The Simptums,” Hadley said, urging them to come toward her table.

“Ella and Sam,” the woman replied. Hadley began to write.

“Oh for Pete’s sake,” Robbie whispered and she walked over and bent down close to Marge’s ear. “Reverse the first names.”

Marge thought for a second then grinned. “Sam and Ella Simptums,” Marge whispered back, so softly Robbie could barely hear her. “Salmonella Symptoms. We’ll hope they’re not poison people.” Scooter was scowling at them. They looked up and gave her an innocent, “Who me?” look. Hadley gave the Simptums their room key, Ken David hoisted the luggage in both arms and headed for a door in the nearest turret.

Next to arrive were two elderly gentlemen dressed in plaid shorts, white tee shirts and sandals over black socks. Both had straw hats which they removed as soon as they entered. One headed toward Marge, the other toward Hadley.

“Good morning,” Marge said.

“Hello Sweetheart. We have a room reserved with two beds. We’re the Bahl brothers.”

Marge picked up her pen, ready to write, and smiled at the man who must be in his nineties.

“I’m Harry Bahls. My brother over there is Buster,”

Robbie did an eye roll. Mary Rose was holding a plate of donuts and Robbie had just gotten a tray of juice glasses filled with orange juice from the kitchen. Each guest was to have juice and a donut. Two coffee urns graced the sideboard with glass cups waiting to be filled and enjoyed. The Simptums had gulped their juice, down on the way to the stairs, filled two coffee cups and passed on the donuts, Robbie looked at the donut plate and felt relieved. She could tell two were missing and Ken David and Geoffrey the Mastiff both had donut crumbs on their lips.

“What were their names again?” Robbie asked Mary Rose in another whisper.

“The Bahls, Harry and Buster.”

“Harry Bahls and Buster Bahls,” Robbie did another eye roll and shook her head. “Where do these names come from? And it isn’t even 10AM!”

Have your books vanished?

Read on:

Replace Lost Books: One of the most common things heard at presentations:

“I loaned my books and never got them back!”

The BOOB Girls have a way of disappearing.

Now we have a website special to replace what is lost

Go to www.theboobgirls.com and press the

Replace Your Books button.

You can get any new, inscribed book for $10 and free shipping.

Order as many as have walked away.

There is another button which says, “Donate to a Care Facility.”

For another $10 we’ll send BOOB Girls I or any book you choose

to an extended care or assisted living community of your choice.

The BOOB Girls there will be grateful and laugh along with you.

Where is Joy in April?

 April 7-Keene Library, Fremont Nebraska, 7pm   Laura England Biggs,1030 North Broad

April 11– Kountze Memorial Lutheran Church, Omaha NE, brunch, 10am 2650 Farnam St, Omaha, NE 68131

April 18 – Holy Cross Luthern, 4117 Terrace Dr. Omaha, NE 68134 10am.

April 19 – Morning Star Lutheran Church, Omaha NE, 12:15pm,  331 S 85th Ave, Omaha, NE 68114 

April 25 – Metro East Conference of ELCA. Rejoice! Lutheran Church, Omaha NE 2pm, 2556 S 138th St, Omaha, NE 68144 

From Joy and The Girls: A Snippet from VII

March 2015 Blog from The BOOB Girls

BOOB Girls VII: Ten Little Puritans is almost ready!!

And you can pick the plot for BOOB Girls VIII

Contents: A Snippet from VII

Picking the Plot for VIII

Speaking Schedule

The girls are back at the not-so-haunted bed and breakfast in Salem’s Crossing, helping with a great Puritan descendant’s reunion. Problem is, the Puritans keep disappearing along with ten beautiful Puritan dolls. And the disappearances match a spooky poem just like in an Agatha Christie mystery.  There’s a suspicious black horse and carriage, more weird names and an unhappy employee from Butch Sleezer’s Fertility Clinic. All combine to make on of the most enjoyable books in The BOOB Girl series. Here’s how VII introduces itself to you on page 1:

Zed Zonker was prancing . . . prancing . . . doing high kicks like a young man leading a marching band, his cane serving as a pounding baton. The cane hit the floor of the Meadow Lakes dining room in strict time to his left foot. Prance – clump– prance – clump.  His physical therapist would have been proud.  He wore high-top black sneakers and was waving a black top hat in his left hand, smiling and waving to an open-mouthed lunch crowd who were paying rapt attention. Zed’s smile beamed under his bushy mustache and he bounced gaily in rhythm. Other than the sneakers and top hat, Zed Zonker was as naked as a jaybird. His aged private parts were bouncing in exactly opposite time to his prancing.

Diners in the back of the dining room were standing to get a better look. No one wanted to miss anything.. Directly behind Zed, and gaining ground rapidly, was Fuss N’ Feathers, the oversized rooster who ruled the Meadow Lakes chicken yard. The big rooster’s head was lowered, his wings spread, his beak open, ready to grab an ankle in a death grip.

Dashing into the dining room was the third star of the show; Sheryl, the new assistant manager at the retirement community. Sheryl’s face matched the rooster’s in determination and grit. She, too, was bent low, gaining on both bird and bare-assed man. Just as Zed turned and prance-kicked down the hall toward the elevators, Sheryl leaned forward even further, nearly lost her balanced, grabbed the rooster and, holding him in both hands, crashed through the side door of the dining room and threw Fuss N’ Feathers high into the air. She grabbed the door frame to keep her balance and let out a gust of held breath. Then she turned back into the dining room, rubbed her hands together and walked with great dignity back toward her office. Four red feathers floated gently to the ground outside the big window.

Help Pick the Plot for BOOB Girls VIII

 I would like to end up with twelve books in the series in honor of Table 12. And I want you to be part of it all. The next book’s working title is:

The BOOB Girls VIII: Nursery Rhymes and Testy Crimes

We will create some crimes which will be committed in the Omaha area that match your favorite nursery rhymes.

Example: Sing a Song of Six Pence

A pocket full of rye

Four and twenty blackbirds

Baked up in a pie.

A local bakery finds 24 dead blackbirds laid out like an arrow, pointing to an empty pie case where all the pies have been stolen.

Here’s what you do:

1.     Remember your favorite nursery rhyme.

2.     Figure out what criminal activity would challenge our girls.

3.     Email it to me at joy.johnson@msn.com

Everyone who submits a nursery rhyme will be thanked in the book and receive a free, inscribed copy. Remember, Ten Little Puritans will be out late spring and at that time I’ll start working on Rhymes and Crimes, so send me your ideas now.

Speaking Schedule - for A Speaking Engagement see email and phone below

March 7: EngAge Health Fair, Elmwood Tower, 9am.

March 11: Papillion Women’s Club,  1pm Trinity Lutheran Church

March 12: Rose Blumkin Home, 1:30pm

March 14- Carroll IA library, 2pm

March 21: Lord of Love Lutheran WELCA, 9am

Groundhog Day Blog

“Geoffrey our Mastiff ate the frigging Groundhog,” Mary Rose McGill stammered out the news as she joined Robinson Leary, Marge Aaron and Hadley Joy Morris-Whitfield at Table 12 in Meadow Lakes Retirement Community’s dining room.

“Did you call the vet?” Robbie asked.

“She doesn’t need to,” Wiley Vondra said. He walked over to their table and pulled up a chair. He turned it around and sat on it backward, his arms resting on the back. At the same time, Alphonso Greatwood, Meadow Lakes owner drove up on his scooter, The Mean Machine.

“Who doesn’t need to what?” he asked.

“Call the vet,” Wiley answered. “On the ranches dogs eat groundhogs all the time. It just means they’ll poop an oversized hairball eventually.”

“I love Groundhog Day,” Robbie said.  “There are a lot of groundhogs and at least one of them will have a forecast more reliable than the weather service.”

Hadley smiled, “Valentine’s Day is too depressing. Groundhog Day gives you a chance to say ‘Punxsutawney’ out loud.”

Marge spoke up, “If a rodent can bring an early spring, more power to it!”

“Look at it this way,” Alphonso said, pouring himself a cup of decaf from the pot on table 12. “The Easter Bunny is a stupid animal that gives us an opportunity to spend money on chocolate. On February 2 you can order pork sausage and, just like old Geoffrey,  eat ground hog.” They moaned. 

Here is what I see from my desk where I’m writing BOOBs VII.

And here’s what critics are saying about what I’ve done with it so far.

Critic I: “It’s the funniest first page of any of the series.”

That’s saying something since I starts with Maggie Patten shooting her husband’s headstone, II starts with the words, “Patty Whack was n fun at all”, III begins with Frieda Grossemouth driving her Cadillac into the dining room, IV sees Percolator  Rasmussen spread eagled on the dining room floor, his head smashed in, his throat cut, a nylon cord around his neck, a bullet hole in his jacket and a knife in his back, V features Mary Rose in Depends and VI show Wiley Vondra and Mary Rose fighting over chickens.

Critic 2: How does she think of all these things? And all those names like Abstinence Evermore and DieWell Barebones, not to mention Sam and Ella Simptums?

Answer: A warped mind.

Critic 3: Joy who? BOOBs VII is fun to write and I hope will be more fun to read.

And we’re offering a special on the next page.

If you have loaned your other BOOB Girls books, and like most, never seen them again, you can replace them by simply emailing me at joy.johnson@msn.com, telling me which ones you want and sending a check for $15 for each book or $66 for all six. No shipping charge for you. You will also be invited to the launch party to be announced as soon as I finish VII.

In the meantime: Here is my schedule for February. Come get a hug at the Carter Lake IA library or Griswold IA or Our Saviors.

February 2 – Owenn Library Carter Lake, Mary Schomer, 10am 1120 Willow

February 18 – Griswold Library, 12pm, Sue Peterson, 712-778-4130

February 19 – Chatty Hens Red Hats, Trinity Village, Jane Jones, jjones@ihsi.org 522 W Lincoln St, Papillion, NE 68046(402) 614-5500

February 22 – Sunday, 2pm Bold Women of ELCA, Our Saviors Evangelical Lutheran Church, 600 Bluff Street, Council Bluffs.  

If you want me to speak at your group or meeting, I would be delighted.

Just call me at 402-639-2939, email me at joy.johnson@msn.com or through my website at www.theboobgirlscom

Happy New Year Blog

Snow sprinkled down in fits and starts, reminding Hadley of powdered sugar. She looked up from Table 12, took off her glasses and squinted out the big window in the dining room of Meadow Lakes Retirement Community. “I love winter when I don’t have to get out.” 

Marge Aaron looked up and nodded.

Mary Rose McGill looked out the window and shivered. “Cold.”

Robinson Leary looked at her three friends and smiled. “I just found the best headlines of 2014. Listen to these, and she leaned toward the laptop computer she had plugged in beside their table. “These are actual headlines,” she added.

“Bugs with Wings are Flying Bug from the Redwood California extension service.”

The other girls looked at her.

“It gets better. Here’s one from an editorial page. Republican Turned Off by Size of Obama’s Package.” They laughed. Robinson Leary had their full attention. Hadley and Mary Rose both took off their glasses. Marge closed her book and leaned closer to Robbie. Robbie giggled.

“Tiger Wood play with own balls, Nike says.”

Marge shook her head. “We are SO BAD! “She leaned as far over as she could to look at Robbie’s computer. “There’s the winner so far!” She read it out loud. “Statistics show teen pregnancy drops off significantly after Age 25.”

Hadley laughed. “I bet that’s true.” Robbie pushed the computer toward her and she read the next one. “Federal Agents Raid Gun Shop. Find Weapons.”

“I want one, too,” Mary Rose said, sliding the computer over to face her. She scrolled up and down for a second or two. “Ah Ha! Another police report! “Marijuana Issue sent to A Joint Committee and this one, February 22. Police Arrest Everybody. Bet that cleaned up the town!”

It was the giggles that attracted Wiley Vondra and Alphonso Greatwood, both of whom were headed toward the soft-serve ice cream machine. They detoured toward the Burned Out Old Broads at Table 12. Without even a greeting, Wiley leaned over the computer. “Hey Greatwood. Get a load of this one, “Woman in sumo wrestling suit attacks ex-girlfriend in Gay Bar after waving to man dressed as a Snickers Bar.  Why do you and I miss all the fun?”

Alphonso drove his scooter, The Mean Machine, up to the table and Mary Rose moved the computer closer to him. He looked, waited a minute then started to laugh. “Here’s my kind of justice. Man who kills lawyer gets new attorney. Let’s make our own headline. How about, Ice cream big hit in retirement community, proving how easily old people are amused.”

They stood up, pushed their chairs to the table and followed him into the Meadow Lakes Bistro where the ice cream machine stood waiting without a headline near it.

Notes from Joy
Come join me for laughter and hugs if you are anywhere near:
Oelwein, Iowa, on Saturday January 10th. I’ll be at the Oelwein Library at 11am with The BOOB Girls.
Menlo, Iowa Saturday, January 24, 2pm. Menlo Library
And if you are interested in having me come and annoy a group of your choice, get in touch.
joy.johnson@msn.com
402-639-2939
Last year I was privileged to have 80 talks and signings and every one was fun and laughter-filled.

The above blog will be somewhere in BOOB Girls VII: Ten Little Puritans. The book will be available in the summer and you’ll all be invited to the launch party. Until then, I give you a heart-felt blessing for 2015:
May your troubles be less
May your blessings be more
And may all kinds of happiness
Come through your door.